Robert Downey, Jr.: Who Knew?

(Apparently anyone who saw this episode of Ally McBeal?)

Christmas Dinner at the Ranch.

This year, I'm trying to make it easy on myself, so I'm cooking a roast that you roast for 1 hour then turn off for 3 hours, then turn the oven on again for 45 minutes and you're done. I haven't made it before but 433 reviewers on Food Network can't be wrong, can they?

Paula Deen's Foolproof Standing Rib Roast

Ina Garten's Roasted Brussels Sprouts

Now, technically, I won't be making the roasted sprouts because my oven will be full of lounging Rib Roast. So I will pan-roast them with olive oil and butter (cut the bottoms off of sprouts and cut in half) and minced garlic. Close the lid for 10 minutes or so over medium heat, stirring occasionally, then remove the lid until they are done to your liking (5-ish minutes) and you won't believe they are Brussels Sprouts - they are unbelievably good. Even if you make the recipe above, do yourself a favor and cut the sprouts in half. They cook differently and get all carmelly and scrumptious.

Once again, a can't-miss in the kitchen: Ina's Potato-Fennel Gratin

Likewise, since my oven will be otherwise occupied, I will be making parmesan-mashed potatoes. But I wouldn't steer you wrong. This gratin is outstanding. It will have you looking at fennel with a newfound love and respect. And use Gruyere, don't replace it with some lesser cheese. Your tastebuds will thank you.

Chocolate Bourbon Pecan Pie, Country Living

Since I am pretty much the only one who eats dessert (can you even believe that?), I will probably just make something I like. My favorite is pecan pie but this pie from Country Living sounds really good. The recipe only gets one star but it was from one review that seemed to be a joke. I will make homemade crust but I will use some shortening instead of all butter for a flakier crust. Also add a pinch of baking powder - it was my great aunt Tressa's secret for flaky crust. I will also take out the chopped pecans and use only whole pecans. How can I pick them off to eat only the filling otherwise?

If I am feeling generous, I will make Yorkshire pudding. They are very tasty with the roast.

So, what's on the menu for your Christmas or holiday dinner?

(Hint. Hint.)

A few last minute-gifts for the antler lover in your life.

Adelaide Gazelle print, Grand Ole Bestiary on etsy

The Dalmore, 12-year-old single malt scotch

Reindeer plates, Wisteria

Deer book box, Wisteria

Just in case you were looking...

The 12 Gays of Christmas.

You're welcome.

Not Delawhere but Delawhy?

Only Stephen Colbert could get Mike Castle to say "I cockblocked Delaware."

(Select watch with normal commercial breaks and you will watch ad-free.)

It's a Gray Day Here in the Nor'east.

And the starfish are strewn about...

via flickr

There's water everywhere...

via desire to inspire

I just need to kick off my shoes...

via persian tea

And crawl back into bed.

Flower Power.

Oh, yes, I changed the headline...

I love this girl's style. She has a blog, Emerson Made, which I discovered via Material Girls blog.

She creates handmade, hand-dyed blossoms to add a little something sassy to a sweater, wedding dress or tee shirt. I love it.

The Big Dandy linen clutch, available here.

Ungloom Bloom: "Maybe you know someone who's been
temporarily clobbered by life..." Wouldn't they love this?
(Although I feel the need to insert another comma... :-)

And her blog is clever, too. Make a new friend today.

Happy Halloween.

Photo by Harry Benson

No Excuse.

via TMZ

I am constantly surrounded by people on the road trying desperately to maneuver their vehicles with one hand because their other hand is busy holding a cell phone. And occasionally the "free" hand is holding a cigarette or something as well as the steering wheel.

If you cannot afford the $20 (or $1.48 on Amazon) for a headset for your cell phone, there is an organization called freeheadset.org which will send you one for free. There is no excuse not to have one.

Maria Shriver is now the poster child for this offense. Her husband signed into California law in 2008 a bill that bans the use of handheld devices while driving (as many states have done) yet she has been photographed multiple times violating the law. That is wildly inexcusable.

So tell me: Do you use a headset or not? Do you text while driving?

This isn't really a laughing matter but this video illustrates the topic using humor (just in case you missed it). I think I drive by that guy twice a week.

My Favorite Headline Ever.

Mayans: World won't end in 2012, so stop asking us about it

I really think there should be a "goddammit" at the end of it. Thank you Mark Stevenson from the AP (and/or his editor). Click here for the story.

HG's Helpful Hint #35.

You know when you post a video from YouTube on your blog (using Blogger) and it looks like this?



Here's how to get it like this:



Just go to Edit Html and change the object width (within the quotations) to 425, then change the object height to 344 (also within the quotation marks). Do this in both places.

Et voila.

Perfection.

Compliments of The Little Sparrow.

It's Shalimar Season.

You know it's fall when I get this out. It's been my favorite scent for 20 years - um, since I was a child. *wink* Just a tidge will do ya.

(This post is to relieve those who were terrified by the bat post :-)

I'm Bat(wo)man.

Okay. So, a couple of weeks ago I came home from the beach (I know, don't cry too much for my Empty Nest Syndrome :-) to check on things and take care of the things that didn't get done while I was away and while I was changing the air conditioner filter in the basement I noticed what looked like an old banana peel on the floor. Of course, it occurred to me that there would not be an old banana peel on the basement floor and I realized it was a bat.

It seemed dead and I was upset because I like bats. They get a bad rap from widespread misinformation and vampire movies when really they're quite valuable for keeping insects under control as well as performing a vital ecological role by pollinating flowers. I carefully scooped it up in a large goldfish net and covered it with a paper plate and when I began to do this I realized it was alive.

I immediately took it outside and put it on the dew-covered ivy because I thought it was probably dehydrated. I came back out with a small eyedropper and tried to feed it some water and you know how a bat must love getting something shoved in its face when it's on its deathbed so that didn't work very well. It seemed to be a little more lively so I thought I'd just drip the water on the ivy and hope for the best. I came back out a little while later to check on it and it had made its way up three stairs!

By that time the bird rescue facility had opened and I called to see if they knew of anyone who would take a bat. They did. I called Hillary (not just BatWoman, but WildlifeWoman) and scooped up the bat (well, sort of) into a box and took it to her. It was not happy during my attempt to get it into the box and looked something like this:

Within minutes, she had the bat out of the box and into her own box with a little bat blankie and fed it an eyedropper of water (you could tell she had done this before) and then gave it a mealworm. Exhausted from all the activity, the bat took a batnap (oh, come on) and then ate the worm. It was so cute.

Alex the Big Brown Bat and Mandy the Mealworm*, Discovery Channel

There's a disorder affecting northeastern bat colonies called white-nose syndrome which has killed something like a million bats so far. So, first it must be tested for that, then introduced into a situation with other bats and then released back into the wild.

She had a couple dozen baby squirrels, a baby bunny, box turtles, skunks, snakes, rabbits, all manner of wildlife. I don't know how she ever does anything else.

Anyway, I'm grateful to her for taking care of this little guy. Oh, and since I wrote this post, the bat has been released back into the wild to terrorize other people in their basements.

*no, of course the mealworm did not have a name

My Empty Nest.

You know, when my daughter left for college, I was going to buy a pool table for her bedroom and I thought there'd be a party every night. My husband and I have been married for only five years so we're practically newlyweds. So, I've actually been excited about this time because I thought we'd get to spend some time together, just us, like you did when you were first married, before children, before four teenagers :-).

But now that I've actually packed my girl off to college and she is settled in and happy (fingers crossed), I'm dealing with a serious case of Empty Nest Syndrome. So if you see me walking my puppy down the street in a stroller with a baby bonnet on, please call the authorities.

Anyway, I'm back but I'll likely be posting much less. I've missed y'all, though. Hope you had a great summer.

Why I'm Looking Forward to the End of Summer.

And look at that carpet, will you? *insert leopardy swoon here*

Okay, as you know, tonight is the Season 3 premiere of Mad Men. I've watched Seasons One and Two twice this summer in preparation. To tide you over for the next several hours, there's a great article on Mad Men in the September Vanity Fair. Click here to read it.

It's like a peek inside Matthew Weiner's perfectly obsessive little head...

I Love Meryl Streep Again.

I saw Julie & Julia yesterday and am happy to inform Meryl that she is off my shit-list from the whole Mamma Mia debacle. She was wonderful and really stole the movie (it should have been renamed Julia & Julie).

I was completely charmed by the love story between Paul and Julia Child and fell a little in love with Stanley Tucci, too, as Child's doting husband. Nora Ephron wrote the screenplay and cleaned it up tout de suite (the book and Julie's blog had the f-bomb every other word and offended many delicate readers).

The kitchens Julia Child cooked in were very small and tended to be unfitted because they lived in Europe in the late 40s and early 50s. Which is funny because the larger and fancier the American kitchen has become, the less cooking actually goes on in it. I love a kitchen with tiled walls and a big pine table in the middle of it, separated! (gasp!) from the family room so I can hide the mess I made from actually cooking! I've always been a renegade...

Speaking of kitchens, the new issue of House Beautiful is a must-buy (and not because it's practically THE ONLY SHELTER MAGAZINE LEFT!). Windsor Smith did this Polo Blue kitchen which I am head-over-heels in love with. There are also black rooms galore (so Black is the New Black, after all, or is Blue the New Black? whichever, I solemnly promise not to use that phrase anymore :-).


But I do find myself admiring blue in a way I never did before. So when I saw 500 Days of Summer starring my girl crush, Zooey Deschanel, I fell in love with her little apartment. Simple, blue toile, iron bed, white-tiled kitchen, quirky little touches like origami birds. Sweet. Sweet movie as well, although as it warns: it is not a love story.

Bill Clinton is Still Awesome.

And I dare you to say otherwise.

Perfect for a Rainy Summer Afternoon.

The scenery in A Summer Place is just breathtaking (it's supposed to be set in Maine but was shot mostly around Carmel and Monterey, CA) and the beautiful old oceanfront Queen Anne inn really exists (although now it's private property). An equally gorgeous Frank Lloyd Wright beach house appears later in the film (and really exists on Scenic Drive in Carmel).

In addition to the beautiful properties, the storyline is really romantic. It's about a man who revisits (with his frigid bitch of a wife and lovely teenage daughter, played by Sandra Dee) the inn where he had a summer job as a lifeguard and a summer romance with a guest's daughter. He discovered that the guest's daughter married the innkeeper's son and they now run the place. There's lots of mad love and drama and sex - it was really quite racy for its time (1959).

You can probably rent it if your video store still exists (I bought it from the local record store).